The cat on the wardrobe

It’s seven o’clock, the birds are singing. You’re wide awake whilst I’m still fast asleep.The sun was bright and the air was cool and as you stood there listening, the cat on the wardrobe started saying these words.

“Take her now. Don’t be scared, it’s alright. Oh, come on, touch her inside. It’s a crime against nature – she’s been waiting all night. Come on, hold her and kiss her and tell her you care. If you wait ’til tomorrow she’ll no longer be there. Come on and give it to her. You know it’s now or never.”

Yeah, the cat on the wardrobe has started saying these words.Your father had told you about the birds and the bees, but never about talking cats. So you ran away as fast as you could. I woke up and looked around with sleepy eyes. And the cat said: “I tried.”